The Tonight Show with Jay
Leno- November 20th, 2003
Jay: My first guest, very funny actor, who created some of the
most memorable characters on Saturday Night Live, some of his films include:
Shrek, of course Austin Powers, the trilogy there. His new movie, 'Dr Suess' the
Cat in the Hat' opens nationwide tomorrow, please welcome Mike Myers!
(Audience cheers. Mike comes out blowing kisses, and starts doing
the "I'm not Worthy" bowing to the audience, and eventually sits down)
Jay: Have a seat.
Mike: I am definitely not worthy, I am not worthy.
Jay: You got a lot of fans here.
Mike: Well it's great. These guys are heroes (to some police or firefighters in the front
row) and I'm very proud to be here.
Thank you so much.
What's great too is that I've just played a cat, so if I get caught in a tree you guys can come get me. (smiles)
(audience laughs)
Jay: That's right! Now congratulations you just had a street named after you?
Mike: Yes, Yes. I actually have 2 streets named after me in Toronto.. and I don't know why, but I'm happy. But one of them got stolen. Not the entire street, nothing so elaborate. Somebody stole the street sign,
and the very Canadian part of that is that the guy stole it and put it in his front window.
(audience laughs)
Jay: Really!?
Mike: And he was like (Canadian impersonation) "Oh yeah, like I'm really proud so I stole this sign, and you know I put it in the front window for people to see, eh."
(audience laughs)
-and then as you thought it couldn't get more Canadian, the neighbour said (Canadian impersonation) "Oh, that's not right. We better call the cops."
(audience laughs)
So the cops came and he said "You're right, fair enough, here's the sign back." and then again it gets more Canadian because the cop went "Well he seems like a nice guy."
(audience laughs)
And then they let him off which I'm glad.
(more laughter)
(Canadian impersonation) "He's just a fan, eh. Nice guy."
(laughter)
Jay: (laughing) Well they're nice people, the Canadians.
Mike: They are.
Jay: Are the New York fans different than the Canadian fans? Do you sense, you know-
Mike: -Yah well, you know I live in New York City, I love New York City. Uh.. New Yorkers are just
way more outgoing than Canadian people. Like in the subway in Toronto I'll come and people will go (changes to laid back, calm voice) "So Mike, you up to see your mom?" and that's
about it. And in New York it's like (yells) "MIKE MYERS! HOW ARE YAH!?"
(audience laughs)
And I'm like 'I'm fine' and then one guy about 3 days ago came up to me and went "I'M SO GLAD I'M SEEING YOU WHEN I'M HIGH!!"
(audience laughs, and applauds)
And I don't know how to take that!
(impersonates guy again) 'I'M HIGH AS A KITE, AND HERE YOU ARE! I FEEL SO GRATEFUL!'
(audience laughs)
Jay: That's a compliment. (laughing)
Mike: I took it as a compliment, why not.
Jay: Now do you get the fans that think they look like you-
Mike: -Yes!
Jay: -I get this a lot. People go: "Oh, my uncle has your chin" The guy looks nothing like me!
Mike: It's rough. It does nothing for my self image, cause usually it's a guy going up to me going: (deforms his face) "Hey Mike, huh? (points to face) Everyone says I look just like you!"
(audience laughs)
And I'm like, mmmm..yeah! I didn't know I looked like someone's butt, but there ya go!
(audience laughs)
Guess I do!
Jay: The family's good?
Mike: Family's great.
Jay: I know, you told me once your dad he was what,..encyclopedias?
Mike: -Encyclopedias yes.
Jay: Door to door?
Mike: Yeah Yeah. In fact this is my wedding ring (shows ring) and is my Dad's Encyclopedia Britannica Salesman of the year ring for 1956.
Jay: Oh, wow.
Mike: So yeah.
Jay: That's pretty cool.
Mike: Yeah.
Jay: But you told me once, that he would tell people he did-
Mike: -See here's my dad, you know in Britain, when he came to Canada, he didn't like it when people would come up and ask you what
you did for a living, he thought that was rude, he thought that if you were like 'occupation identified' that you know..and he
didn't make a lot of money, so he always thought that if he says 'I sell encyclopedias' people are going to say 'Oh, he doesn't make a lot of money' so my dad
would make up things like "I invented the metal tips on shoe laces" or 'What do you do for a living?', "Well actually I play the bongo drums on the mission impossible theme."
Just make up crazy stuff.
(audience laughs)
Jay: Big money in that!
(audience laughs)
Mike: Yes. That's right. (laughs) He went for the big bucks and said he was a poet once, but yah my dad was insane, and my mother
is insane, and I'm the product of 2 insane people.
(audience laughs)
Jay: And you're the youngest of 3?
Mike: 3 insane children, yes.
Jay: Now were you picked on as the youngest? Were you always the put upon child, the hand me down child?
Mike: Yah, I was a punching bag. I was pretty small to begin with. My two older brothers used to just you know.. I've had my head farted on more times than I care to admit.
(audience laughs)
Mike: You know it's a bad sign when-
Jay: -Can we just see that image in our own heads (laughs)-
Mike: Oh yah, and it always started bad too. It would always be: (pretends to whisper to someone) "Hey Mike, hey buddy, come here..."
Whenever it started with 'Hey Buddy', I knew I was drinking somebody's urine.
(audience laughs)
They even one time, they routinely used to strip me naked, we used to live in an apartment building, and they'd strip me naked and threw me in the hall and lock me out and
we had a lady from India who lived next door, and was really lovely, but she was a very small woman, and I was her exact Sari size, so I would put on the
Indian dress and would have to wait
by the door wearing an Indian ladies dress because I had no clothes and then my mom would eventually come home-
(audience laughs)
But I grew to love Currie.
(audience laughs)
You know, and I'm a great believer in medicines both Western and Vadaiic (sp?), and I have a good knowledge of that subcontinent.
Jay: That's a frightening childhood.
Mike: I had a frightening childhood.
Jay: But you know, I always get a kick cause we talk about our moms, and your mom reminds me of my mom. That odd sort of.. I dunno if it's odd.. eccentric? would that be the word?
Mike: Uh, I'd say in Britain they'd say eccentric, and then in North America they'd say 'Clinically Insane.'
(audience laughs)
Jay: Yah, Yah.
Mike: But uh, yah know, she's just great. My mom, she's a great mother, she raised us all to have interests, and hobbies, and stuff like that.
So you know. In fact 'Cat in the Hat' is kind of a tribute to her cause she used to read, the first book I ever read was Cat in the Hat, and the first book ever
read to me was Cat in the Hat, and my mom used to read it in a liverpool accent cause she's from liverpool, and so for me it was like:
(changes to liverpool accent) "In this box of two things, I will show them to you. Two things, and I call them Thing 1, and Thing 2, like."
(audience laughs)
Jay: (laughs )With the little thing at the end-
Mike: -So for me, they talked like (changes accent) the beatles. Ya know "I'm the cat in the hat, turn left at Greenland"
(audience laughs)
Jay: We'll take a break and find out more about the Cat in the Hat right after this. (audience cheers) More with Mike Myers!
**COMMERCIAL**
Jay: Welcome back,
we're talking with Mike Myers from 'The Cat in the Hat' movie, we were just
swapping mom stories during the commercial. Now what we're you telling me, your
mom you mentioned is somewhat eccentric, and what is it.. gift shops?..
Mike: My mom has a photographic memory for 2 things that are completely useless to have photographic memories for. 1 is the name of any gift shop she's ever been into, and weird things too like I'd go "I got a bad taste in my mouth" and my mom goes: (impersonates) "Here, have a Certes with Retson."
(audience laughs)
It's like what? (impersonates) "Certes, it has Retson. It's the active ingredient." I said 'Oh, where did you get
these?' "At LaMonts." 'What the hell is
LaMonts?' "That's the gift shop Micheal. Right next to Trade Winds,
and Mandalay Bay."
(audience laughs)
And she memorizes every meal she's ever had.
Jay: Every meal?
Mike: Every meal she's ever had! So I'll say to her ok 'God..what was the
date of..' and I'll throw out something obscure '..of the Suez Crisis in 1956?' and she'll
go "Ooh..I don't remember." 'Well what were you eating?' "Oh! Egg and Chips. It was September 25,1956."-
(audience laughs)
Jay: (laughing) That's odd.
Mike: It's very odd.. you can see that it has in no way affected me or my work. (looks at different cameras)
(audience laughs)
Jay: Now tell us about this movie, this movie, the set's, the colours, it's... it actually looks like the book and the illustrations.
Mike: Bo Welch, the director has done an amazing job, this guy is a genuis and I think a star is born, he used to work with Tim Burton.
He created this amazing world that just reminded me of being in 'Chitty Chitty, Bang Bang' and 'Willy Wonka' and in fact they built an entire housing development and people from the highway used to come off the highway- "
Jay: Yeah I'd see it, it's off the 118 and I'd go by and go 'What! Who lives there!?.. Those are the oddest houses!'
Mike:-Well they had to get extra security because people wanted to get brochures to buy into that community.
(audience laughs)
Mike: And so we were there and I'd have friends, and normally when friends come to the set they visit for like 25min and realize that making a movie is the most boring thing in the world. It's like watching paint dry, but I had people staying for 9, 10 hours, just because they were happy to be in that world.
Jay: And the two kids, Dakota and Spencer. Is this the first time, have you done a movie with kids?
Mike: Well people tell you to never work with animals and to never work with children. Well I played an animal and worked with children.
(audience laughs)
Mike: And it's the best thing I've ever done. I had the most fun. Little Dakota who plays Sally is so sweet. It was all I could do to not bite her face, now I wasn't going to break skin, just naw a bit, she's so sweet. You'd be in the scene and be 'Oh, it's my line!' ya know, you'd forget.
And Spencer Breslin is a genuis. I mean this guy's like 12 going on 50, and you know I would say to him stuff like 'So where do you live?' "Oh, I live in New York. I don't know, I think I prefer the old world sensability of a place like that." and I'd go 'Buddy, you're 12, you should be flickin boogers, what's going on?'
(audience laughs)
You know what I mean?
Jay: Yeah he was here the other night, he mentioned he was going out with his girl and he says "The distance makes the relationship last longer, you don't want to see her too much."
(audience laughs)
And I said, 'What are you a 40 year old man?'
Mike: He is! I want to be like him when I grow up.
(audience laughs)
Jay: Now we have a clip of the film. What's this scene we're going to see?
Mike: Uh, I think this is.. I'm not sure. I'm that guy who comes on and doesn't know.
Jay: -The cat goes crazy and wrecks the house?
Mike: Yeah I think, oh, I think I'm turned into a pineta, am I not? (he turns to check one of the monitors offscreen) Yes I am, Yes I am.
Jay: Let's take a look, now that's a real set, not a back drop, that's all built? (referring to background scenery of paused clip)
Mike: - That's all built!
Jay: That's all built in the hills! And when you drive by on the highway this is what you see, and you'd go 'Look at that tree! Where is that tree!?'
Mike: It's crazy! I would be sad to go home at the end of the day 'cause real life is not nearly as nice.
Jay: Take a look. Cat in the Hat.
(shows clip)
(audience cheers)
Mike: That was a hard day, wow you know-
Jay: How many takes was that?
Mike: That was 25 takes, 25 takes, being in that makeup, suspended on a rope, and they tie it around certain spots that shouldn't have ropes tied around it-
Jay: Exactly-
Mike: - And you know, you can tell little kids and they're all sweet as can be, but there are certain places that are off limits in terms of hitting, and they don't listen!
(audience laughs)
Mike: I was black and blue in places that I didn't know actually bruised-
(laughter)
Mike: - but they do!
(more laughing)
Jay: Well it's a very funny film, it's 'The Cat in the Hat', it opend tomorrow, wonderful job Mike-
Mike:-Thank you so much.
Jay: Mike Myers!
(they shake hands and audience cheers, Mike does the 'I'm not Worthy' action again)
